Tired As Hell, We Pulled Into Vegas Tired as hell, we pulled into Vegas We thanked the heavens for the chance that they gave us The chance we were given with Golden State women After how far we'd driven, the trade-off seemed fine Now I got mine, and you lost yours In the Great Plains demons of second-hand stores We had second-hand plans for the opposite shore Where they drink to remember to forget being poor On the first day of our last summer vacation A scraper drove by playing your station And I heard Lil' Jon say "Yeah, okay." "Yeah, okay." And I can't forget that dead desert smell And I can't remember just when darkness fell We pulled into Vegas tired as hell We pulled into Vegas tired as hell We were dragged to the coast on the backs of our mules To where fables and fools sit on tables and stools Women read the paper and the men are all bimbos And the stars are all falling and the dogs jump through windows She said her name was Betsy Ross My history is shaky, but I was skeptical And you, you were at a loss All her nice knitting star-spangled your spectacles Just pop the question, step on it, crank it We don't need love or national blankets Just a quiet place to stay She said "yeah, okay." "Yeah, okay." And I think their god has abandoned his post And I think that hope is what we miss most On the backs of our mules we were dragged to the coast On the backs of our mules we were dragged to the coast By the time we got home, the town was a lake Thank God it's a stick-shift, it'll keep me awake No you get your rest, you'll need it, I'll drive I've got a place to stay 'till the flooding subsides We tried but the National Guard put up roadblocks And roadblocks can't stop us, but this is Atlantis And the bridge into town couldn't withstand this Now it's three hundred miles through the ass-end of Kansas Oh Lord, if you get me home safe after all we've been through I swear I won't stay out late again I head the engine groan as I prayed, "Yeah, okay. Yeah, okay." Now we could use some desert air blowin' Through this tent city under the Alamo Dome The town was a lake by the time we got home The town was a lake by the time we got home